Sleep Deprivation

So when you get to certain point, you cease being tired and just get annoyed. Although I have not reached this point recently, I feel as though it may be coming shortly.

Have you ever got to the point where you wanted to sleep so much that you tried to stay up for days in a row just so that you can sleep regularily for one night. Well if you haven't let me tell you that it is not the suggested approach to sleep problems.

Having just returned from an 18 day stent back in the states, I felt as though returning to this country I would be coming back fully rested and ready to get back to work. Well the later part of that statement is correct, I am ready to get back to work. This is part of the problem, I have been extremely busy, even in the last four days since I have been back, that my body hasn't adjusted back to the screwed up sleep cycle that is Iraq.

Life is frustrating, sometimes people say one thing to you, and you make decisions based upon that, only to find that they weren't totally honest with you about how they felt. This causes emotional turmoil because you feel that if you had known how they truly felt in the first place that you would have made a totally different decision. Now what has happened instead is that you have unintentionally hurt someone you really care about because you thought you were playing inside the lines when the lines weren't even clearly drawn in the first place. This is why war is so much easier to deal with than real life, the lines are clearly drawn in the sand and if I piss you off too bad cause if you wanna come at me Ill just fucking destroy you.
But life isn't like this, there are feelings to consider, and you have to be polite, you have to worry that if you say the wrong thing that it is gonna come back and bite you in the ass (without you even knowing it).

So I write out to the void, and maybe just by saying this I am answering my own questions, who knows. That is the great hardship that is life, it hurts, life sucks and sometimes you just have to deal with it. I wish that I could get answers to these questions, but I know that is not the case. So I guess I will just leave it as this.

RAKKASAN